I am a PR major at USC. I am 6', 162lbs and I train for races and obstacle courses. I will not pretend to be an expert on nutrition, weight loss, or training, but it is my passion. I love this shit.

What is healthy?
I don’t like that word, it’s subjective. But anyway, foods I’ve eaten today: loads of pork loin, sweet potato, whole grain rice, eggs, and a fiber one bar.
Dinner stuff will be more pork loin and broccoli with loads a’ buttaaaa
Mmmmm buttaaaa

Thursday night, I hadn’t been so hard on myself since high school. Normally, if I stop working out for 3+ days, I feel bloated and sluggish, but I’ve been in the gym 4 days a week with no problems. 

I felt absolutely huge. I’m 6’, and was leaning towards 180lbs for a while, and I felt like my stomach was bulging. It wasn’t so much that I felt “fat”, I just felt massive, like I took up a huge amount of space. 

I have broad shoulders naturally, and I love my back. Broad shoulders are normally a sign of great strength and I love that, but put me in a room with a bunch of 5’4 stick-thin sorority girls and I will absolutely feel huge. 

It has absolutely nothing to do with me wanting to look like them. There is nothing wrong with their bodies, I would just rather have some muscles on me. 

All of the women in my family, ALL of them, are 5’5 and under. I’m freaking huge when we all get together. Not only are they all under 5’5, they are also stick thin, but with big boobs… I don’t get it, except one, but she’s a national championship cheerleader. That doesn’t help my point… Again, I don’t want to be 5’5 and a stick. I like my body 90% of the time, it’s just when I get around my family… I am massive.

What’s funny is that even at my leanest, I am still huge. My grandmother was extremely petite and gave birth to two petite women. My mom had to marry a giant and here I am. 

Back to my point, I guess. Thursday night was hard. And even though I hate gender roles and stereotyping, I guess sometimes I do wish I was smaller and more “feminine”. The boyfriend is 6’5 and 300lbs, so he always makes me feel small, but it’s not about him. It’s about how I feel. 

This feeling comes and goes. It is coming less and less frequently, so that’s nice. 

Reblogged from bitch-cat  14,295 notes

luvyourselfsomeesteem:

Eh, I don’t like when people be like “black girls watch out cause white girls getting booty these days” cause to a black girl’s ears it kinda sounds like “watch out because your only value is your fetishized body and once that’s gone you’ll truly be worthless”